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Jerry Alders

"Don't let the sound of your own wheels drive you crazy."

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RP Hooks
Former Wrestling Promoter: Started as a manager and agent for the WWA in Santa Cruz, moved on to a promoter for an outlaw promotion in Prospect during the early 2000s before it folded messily. Never on cable, only circulated by tapes. Ask for some merch, he's giving it out free.

Too Damn Tall: He's 6'9" even if he feels half that size. Might be startling, but he is the least intimidating individual.

Office Furniture Supply Manager: Sells office chairs and desks direct or from showroom. Not much action, just a whole lot of waiting.

Santa Cruz Native: Born and raised in Surf City, but doesn't surf.

UC Santa Cruz: Go Banana Slugs! Majored in business, the women's studies, then pot. Then dropped out.

Wastoid: Most of his teens and twenties were a blur of drugs, drink and wanton excess. Don't ask him his past, there's not much he remembers.

Recovering Everything: Alcoholic, sexaholic, pornaholic, workaholic, shopaholic, narcotics addict, he's kicked almost all of them and now tries to live pretty clean.

Classic Rock Enthusiast: Arena rock, prog rock and yacht rock tend to be his jam. Mellow is the order of the day, but has been known to jam out on air guitar.

Sports Fan: He's not very violent, but he likes violent sports like football, hockey and boxing. Baseball involves drinking so he generally stays away.

Generation X: Born 1969, a child of MTV with a distinct lack of drive.

Wild Niece: He is the responsible uncle, for once, trying to give her a better example.

Dogged Nice Guy: He never fights back, always tries to do the right thing and be generally friendly. Doormat might be more appropriate.

Closeted: He's never been too quiet about it, considering his sexaholic past. He was just raised in a generation where talking about it wasn't cool, and being sexual now risks relapse. Besides, who needs to wave a flag when someone else will do it for you?

Lapse Eastern Spiritualist: Tried the Buddhist route, meditation and transcendentalism. It's got it's good points but it's just not his bag, man.

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Full Name: Jerome Edmund Alders

Date of Birth: February 9, 1969

Apparent Age: Late 40s

Ethnicity: Irish American

Origin: Santa Cruz, CA

Concept: Former Wrestling Promoter

Occupation: Office Furniture Store Manager

Demeanor: Conformist

Religion: Lapse Buddhist

Path of Enlightenment: Humanity

Notable Traits: Extreme height, balding

Enneagram: Nine (Peacemaker)

Height: 6'9"

Weight: 305 lbs

Fighting Class: Punching Bag

Eye Color: Brown

Hair: Auburn

Jerry's Song: Bruce Springsteen - Hungry Heart

Played by: Tom Scharpling

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Charlotte: She's a mess, and I love her to death. What can I say?

Wormwood: Was nice enough to beat me up slowly! When I find a Pong console, it's on!
Tabitha: Don't let it bug you, people can be asses but you don't need that heat.

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The man is tall. Hell, tall is an under-statement. At 6'9" He is generally the tallest man in the room. Despite this, he is in a constant slouch to make himself appear smaller, and despite his size he is generally the last to be noticed. Avuncular is the proper term for him, very soft, doughy and uninteresting in every other way. In his shape he resembles a great potato sack that has settled, over three hundred pounds with buggy-whip arms and fat, stubby fingers. In all things he is pear-like, copious amounts of body hair and pasty white skin are hidden beneath loose-fitting polo shirts and ill-chosen blue jeans. His head is fairly chinless, big brown eyes in a constant droopy, hang-dog look with a potato for a nose and a protruding lower lip. His scruffy black hair couldn't decide if it wanted to vacate the premises, and is a patchy work of male pattern baldness on top. Voice is always soft and easy, giving the impression he's just going to crashing on your couch a few days while he gets his life back together. Honest.

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